“Sometime what we avoid most is not pain but mystery.” Their relationship evolves from one of hurt, anger, and misunderstanding, to one wrought with new landmines as Faye’s story is guardedly told; achingly, sorrowfully, and reluctantly building trust and understanding. At the intersection of the collision is Samuel’s unrelenting pursuit to comprehend his mother’s desertion and his mother learning that her heart is in fact big enough to share…
“When you suddenly recognize that not only are you living a life you never intended to lead but also you are feeling assaulted and punished by the life you have. You begin searching for these early wrong turns. What moment led you into the maze? You begin thinking the entrance to the maze might also be the exit, and if you can identify the moment you screwed up then you can perform some huge course correction and save yourself.”
Did I mention that the story has a Nisse as a leading character? Don’t let that scare you off. While the gnome is an integral part of the story, it feels a little like Agnes Nutter in the Neil Gaiman collaboration with Terry Pratchett in “Good Omens.” Not all bad, but not all good. “The way to get rid of a ghost is to take it home.” The lesson, Hill attempts to convince us, is that everything originates from events very early in our history and to overcome the things that cause us pain and regret involves a little self-examination, self-deprecation, therapy, and lies, but mostly sharing the truth.
Structurally, the story plots along like Don DeLillo’s “Underworld,” (or the Outlander series by Diana Gabaldon if you are so inclined) moving back and forth in time with strife, angst, and all kinds of social unrest thrown in for good measure. There are several points that harken to Sinclair’s “Jungle” with a little “Hunger Games” thrown in for dramatic effect. You will know it when you see it!
There are parts of the story where Kevin Spacey turns to the camera and starts telling the backstory (ala House of Cards!)
“What Faye won’t understand and may never understand is that there is not one true self hidden by many false ones. Rather, there is one true self hidden by many other true ones… And the more she believes she only has one true self, the more she flees to find it. She’s like someone trapped in quicksand whose efforts to escape only make her drown faster. Will she ever understand this? Who knows? SEEING OURSELVES CLEARLY IS THE PROJECT OF A LIFETIME.”
These moments offers the reader insight into the inner psychological underpinnings of the scene. Rather than feeling annoyed by these revelatory dialogues, this reader is thankful that Hill didn’t clutter the great narrative with a spin-off for pages on the psychic moment, instead just offering it plain and simple. And so that is how I will conclude this review: giving you one more nugget that you will want to eat without slathering on the honey mustard sauce because you just want to taste the chicken!
“…sometimes a crisis is not really a crisis at all – just a new beginning. Because one thing she’s learned through all this is that if a new beginning is really new, it will feel like a crisis. Any change should make you feel, at first, afraid. If you’re not afraid of it, then it’s not real change.”